When Heaven’s Gate Seemed Closed



It was one of those ordinary days. I woke up complaining of not having had enough sleep and wished could have stayed in bed for a few more hours. Then the phone rang. What happened next was something that I wished did not.

“It’s me, Pushpa – our friend Sue has passed on…”

I was too stunned to talk. The tears stemmed down freely on my face and for a while my mind went blank; I kept repeating to myself that it couldn’t be true. In my mind I thought I have prepared myself for this moment yet there is nothing like hearing it real. I wanted to deny it and even questioned God why?

My mind traced back the night before when I visited her; just 12 hours ago. Somehow I had a feeling that she is not going to make it even though I pleaded to God in prayer to extend her life, for the sake of her family, her friends and those who are praying for her recovery. She had faith; we talked about her getting well and fulfilling her promise to visit my home that Christmas; she talked about going to miss me as I will be going on holiday for 3 weeks; we talked, we joked, we laughed as if there is no tomorrow.

I knew she was in pain as often times I would see her face grimaced while she talks; yet she did not complain. Always free-spirited and not wanting to be a burden to her family and friends, she would mask her pain by making light-hearted comments that would put everyone smiling. That’s Sue, someone who was not spared by the vicious breast cancer which took her life after less than a year of being diagnosed by it at a young age of 25. Sue, my friend who supported me while I was adjusting as a staff nurse in a foreign country; someone who taught me how to be brave and not loose dignity even when facing the enemy which is death; Sue, an example of a person whose faith was tested even until the end of her life.

My friend’s untimely death made me realized how fragile life is. Today, breast cancer is the 2nd cause of death in the world. In Malaysia where I come from, it is the leading cause of death among women. Studies showed that lifestyle factors – such as lack of exercise, lack of vegetables and fruits in the diet, smoking, alcohol consumption and being obese – are the most common yet preventable cause of this disease.

It has been 5 five years since her death and the cases of breast cancer is still growing. There are times when I still think of her; yet every time I am faced with something that seems difficult to overcome, I remember her bravado; her inner peace which stayed even when heaven’s gate seemed closed. In my heart I know that one day, I will see her again.

“For I am persuaded that neither death nor life can be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus”