Optimism: Foundation of our Sanity

The other day while I was doing my usual evening walk, I was startled by someone calling me from behind. As I looked, I saw this beautiful young girl, probably around 17 and with a big, beautiful smile; she asked me if she could join me. I was more than happy to have a company so I readily agreed. The next thing that she said almost made me flipped! Here it goes:

She said: The other day I was with my Mom & we saw you walking and I thought it would be nice to walk with you.
I said: I’m glad you did (smile)
She said: You look really young!
I said: hmmm….not rea….
She said: Are you 19 years old? ‘cos I’m 16 (smile)

I burst out laughing the whole of our condo unit must have wondered where did that thunderous loud come from?

No I didn’t, but I was grinning from ear to ear. I told her in my most well-mannered-don’t-want-to-offend-you-but-I’m-flattered-tone the no, I’m not and I told her my actual age in which, even under the dark sky I could see her blushing and a look that says how-can-I-make-such-a-booboo? I reassured her that it was okay and that 3 out of 5 people would normally guess my age incorrectly. We ended up laughing and having the best time of our walk!

Many of us do feel a slight trepidation about our looks vs our age. While some may feel offended if someone calls them “Aunty” or “Uncle” I actually relish it! It boggles me how I would feel more offended if they wouldn’t; the sound of someone calling me “Aunty Jane” is like a music to my ear; I don’t know, it’s an enigma even to myself.

Probably because looking young gives you a disadvantage of not being treated seriously. I remembered one time when I was invited to conduct a lecture; I felt this piercing look from the audience examining me from head-to-toe saying as if “do you really know anything?” Another guy in college told me once; “you know Jane, by simply looking at you, people may think that you know nothing!” I wasn’t sure if he was joking but it sure pierced my heart like a double-edged-sword. That was the time I wished I could fast forward the time and I’d be 30!

So how do we stay looking young, you might ask?

Well, some people are gifted with “young-looking-genes” (this we have no control over) while some acquire it through having a positive attitude.

There are 2 types of people in this world – the one who sees the mud and the other, sees the bright star; the one who sees the glass as half-full and the other, half-empty; they are also known as the optimists and the pessimists; the positives and the negatives.

Optimism allows you to find meaning in what you encounter while pessimism results in hopelessness and feeling trapped, pain and humiliation, depression and cynicism (a cynic is a faultfinding critic). Optimistic outlook allows us to laugh even when things do not turn out as we had expected. According to research, children are natural optimists. They have inborn immunity and abundant irrational hope. They think good events last forever and bad events melt away quickly.

No wonder they look young!